1 - Au pairs are intrusive
If you think having friends over for a weekend is intrusive, then the au pair is intrusive. More seriously, the au pair will quickly become part of your family. After the first few moments, when it’s of course necessary to get to know each other, it’ll be a bit like taking in a nephew or niece. He’s in your home and will adapt to the family rules, but he’ll find it normal to see you in your robe at breakfast time. And if you’re worried about your privacy, you can of course establish rules and share them with your au pair. These may concern bathroom times or hours when silence is required. But don’t forget that the au pair is not a domestic employee, but someone who will be part of your family for a long time to come.
2 - Au pairs require a lot of organization
Of course, your au pair needs a minimum of visibility on his or her schedule to plan the thirty or so hours a week he or she will spend with your children, and to make the most of his or her free time. But if the unexpected happens, he’s there! Is your youngest child ill? The au pair can pick her up from school while you finish your urgent business. Is the older child invited to a birthday party next Wednesday? Your au pair can even pick up a present in the meantime. Got a long meeting? Your au pair can feed the kids and you’ll be back in time for your evening story. Getting organized? Yes, a little, but with an au pair, the unexpected is so much easier to manage.
3 - Au pairs interfere with children's education.
Your au pair is not a childcare professional. And that’s good news, because he or she doesn’t have any great principles about raising children. In other words, in your home, your rules will prevail. Your au pair will want to pass on what you ask of him/her. And as with BUTRFLY, he or she has been chosen to match your personality traits, you’ll have double the chances of getting on well together.
4 - I can't host an au pair because I don't have a room available
The au pair is part of the family. Ideally, he or she will have a separate room in your apartment or house. But in some cities, where space is at a premium, extra rooms are not available. In this case, it’s possible to rent the au pair a room or apartment at another address, if possible close to the family home. The costs are covered by the family, and the au pair continues to eat at home. For more information, we’re here to help.
5 - Au pairs are expensive and full of red tape
Choosing an au pair means paying pocket money every week in addition to room and board. Admittedly, it’s not nothing, but it’s a lot less than a full-time nanny. And your au pair is there to smooth out family life and lend a hand with everyday tasks, whatever the number of children. When it comes to paperwork, BUTRFLY is here to help. All in all, you’ll need to register with your health insurance company and pay a social security fee if your stay is longer than 3 months. Is that all? Yes, that’s all. As for pocket money, BUTRFLY takes care of everything and transfers the agreed amount to your au pair’s account every Monday.
6 - Au pairs are for perfect families (mom, dad and kids)
Whether you’re a single-parent family, a homoparental family or a blended family, you’re entitled to the joy of having an au pair at home! You just need to have at least one child at home to be able to welcome an au pair into your home. And to really want to. That’s all there is to it!
7 - An au pair is a stranger in your own home.
Your au pair won’t be a stranger for long. With our BUTRFLY system and multi-criteria selection, we give you every chance of getting along perfectly. We even include video interviews so you can get to know each other before you leave. And once you’re home, it’s up to you to adopt your au pair, just as he or she will adopt your children. The idea? To make your au pair a new member of the family as quickly as possible, by explaining your habits and what’s important to you, and introducing them to your culture and what you like, just as they’ll introduce you to their origins. We don’t give you a month to become inseparable!
8 - The au pair is a young woman in the house who risks blowing up my relationship
Ah, the myth of the au pair… It’s far more likely that your au pair will be curious to meet boys her own age than to make eyes at your husband. However, if this possibility keeps you awake at night, you can always opt for an au pair. That’s fine too!
9 - The au pair is an immature teenager with problems
It takes balance and maturity to decide to go abroad, far from your family cocoon, to experience new things and discover another world. It takes maturity to decide to devote yourself to others (in this case, your children). That it takes open-mindedness to dare to let go of all your habits and embrace new ones. Of course, like everyone else, your au pair may have his or her moments and moods. But it would be a good sign if he shared them with you. Maybe you’ll even be honored. And maybe, one day, you’ll even want to share your own moods with your au pair. That’s the joy of expanding the family and having someone very close to share your life with.
10 - Au pairs are good for looking after young children
The au pair is a bit like a big brother or sister. They can be there for cuddles and games, but also for drawings and stunts in the park, and later for homework and confidences. There’s no wrong age for an au pair. In fact, some au pairs arrived when the children were very small and stayed for years because the bond was so strong. When we tell you that an au pair is a new member of the family!
